Like others here humbly seeking blessings from strangers, I ask from the bottom of my heart and in the most humble of tones, for your help today. For those of you reading this story and have had a loved one ravaged and taken too soon by Alzheimer's, you know that this disease is one of the cruelest diseases cast on humankind. Not only robbing your loved one of their mind and then their body, but also leaving their caregiver emotionally, physically, and mentally exhausted, but worst of all, financially drained from the years of caring for them. My name is Angeline Askham and I need your help to save my 85-year-old mom's home, and everything else we have fought so hard for the past 28 years, as we are in immediate danger of LOSING OUR HOME TO FORECLOSURE. I am honored that you have already clicked on our story and ask that you continue reading to the end and if you can, donate to our family no matter how big or small because any amount matters, and we are in the greatest of appreciation of you and your kindness. Last week, I was completely humbled by a stranger who gave me $10 for a few gallons of gas as I counted out change on the attendant's counter. He was probably frustrated and didn't want to wait, but it was his small gesture of kindness, one he has most likely already forgotten, but he helped me that day and I will never forget it. After years of caring for my dad after he suffered a stroke in 2009 and making sure that he was properly and decently taken care of in a long-term care facility starting in 2018, I struggled to rebuild my bank account and restore my credit after spending over $200K for his care because he did not have a retirement fund other than a small professor's pension. I had no regrets as I was able to say goodbye to him last year and tell him that I loved him, it was OK to go and knew that he was going to be pain-free and peaceful. I loved my father immensely as he, and my mom, are the reason I am the person that I am today. He was a pain in the ass, as many others can attest to, we had a complicated father-daughter relationship but it was one full of respect. Many people told me to walk away and let the state take care of him because they saw the toll it was taking on me. I was always exhausted, stressed out, and financially drained and looking back now, I see how it detrimentally affected my career as an Architect just as I was reaching my prime. I was also blind to what it was doing to my body until it was too late. But I never walked away from my dad. RIP dad! 03.09.2024 I love you! Just as my father passed away, I had no time to breathe as my mom's Alzheimer's was rapidly progressing and her mind quickly deteriorating. It is also when my body started breaking down. Starting with a lower lumbar Compression Vertebrae Fracture (VCF) of my L-4 vertebrae, trying to hoist my extra large Newfoundland into the car, it only too a few more months for me to have multiple compression vertebral fractures, a fractured pelvis (front and back), multiple rips, left toe and foot. Turns out that I have the bones of a 90-year-old and I can't be surgically fixed as there isn't any bone structure to attach any stabilizing hardware to. My body has failed me, but it isn't the debilitating pain, loss of mobility or fear of my own future; paralysis or even death, that keeps me awake at night crying but that I have failed my mom by not being able to provide for her as I promised, especially as she is being robbed of life by Alzheimer's. 28 years ago my mom and I bought our home, a 2-unit building (2 flats) after I was able to convince my mom to begin the next chapter of her life here in San Francisco, where she was once a pediatric nurse at UCSF back in the 60s, after divorcing my father after 30 years of marriage. I promised her that this would be her forever home until she could no longer live here on her own, even with the 24/7 help that I provide her with. However, as my injuries (listed below) stacked up, I could no longer work and went on state disability for my Musculoskeletal and spinal injuries. Unfortunately, the monthly checks were so small that I fell further behind every month even though I tapped into all of my financial resources; draining my savings and retirement IRA (401K) accounts, maxing out my credit cards and consolidating my debts. But for the first time in my life, I couldn't keep up and the bank issued an Intent to Foreclose on our home. My state disability ran out and while I wait for approval from the federal government for permanent disability, I haven't had an income in months and don't foresee one for months or even years to come. 02/02/2024 10:14 AM PST BONE DENSITOMETRY (DXA) Left Femoral Neck: BMD = 0.607 g/cm2 T-score = -2.2 (osteopenia) Z-score = -1.3 01/20/2024 10:00 PM PST MRI CERVICAL AND THORACIC SPINE WITHOUT CONTRAST ** HISTORY **: 52 years old, multiple compression fractures of the lumbar spine. Evaluate for stenosis, myelopathy. COMPARISONS: MR 10/17/2024 and 5/4/2024 DISCS: Mild multilevel disc desiccation. BONES : Chronic superior endplate compression fracture of L1 with 10% height loss and mild endplate marrow edema Successful vertebroplasty 11/04/2024 at T12, L1 and L3. Mild leakage thru fracture line at T12. Chronic superior endplate compression fracture of L3 with height loss of 20% without angulation and mild endplate marrow edema Stable chronic superior endplate compression fracture of L4 with 23% height loss and endplate marrow edema Chronic superior endplate compression fracture of T5 with 15% height loss Chronic superior endplate compression fracture of T7 with 20% height loss Severe height loss T12 compression fracture with approximately 50 % loss of height. Mild retropulsion of the superior aspect of the T12 vertebral body into the spinal canal with resultant mild canal stenosis. There is asymmetric marrow edema throughout the left hemisacrum with a curvilinear T1 hyperintense fracture line, compatible with insufficiency fracture. SOFT TISSUES: C2-C3: Circumferential disc bulge and mild facet arthritis. No canal stenosis. Mild bilateral foraminal stenosis. C3-C4: Circumferential disc bulge, mild ligament flavum thickening and facet arthritis. Disc osteophyte complex and uncovertebral spurring, mild canal stenosis and bilateral foraminal stenosis. C4-C5: Mild disc bulge, mild ligamentum flavum thickening and moderate facet arthritis. No canal stenosis. Mild bilateral foraminal stenosis. C5-S1: Mild disc bulge and facet arthritis. No canal stenosis. Severe bilateral foraminal stenosis. THORACIC SPINE: Disc bulge at T11-T12 with associated retropulsion of the superior aspect of the T12 vertebral body, resulting in mild canal stenosis. Otherwise, no canal or foraminal stenosis. For those who don't understand what these MRI readings mean, and even I don't as I still haven't had a doctor explain my injuries or their seriousness to me, it is that I am in a severe amount of pain constantly. I cannot stand for more than 2 minutes without pain shooting through my back and legs. I can't walk for more than 50 feet, again without pain, etc. etc. etc. I'm exhausted being in pain and without any relief, depressed and honestly really scared. I share this with you because I want to show that my desperate plea for financial help is honest and not due to laziness or lack of trying. I am also asking for help getting answers to my medical issues. I lost my health insurance earlier this year and was not able to get some blood work done to see if there was any underlying condition, most likely cancer, causing my body to break down so quickly. But until I have health insurance and can pay my medical bills, which I have too many of already that I can't pay, I think that I prefer being in the dark because if I can't afford to fix my body, ignorance will continue being bliss, even though the pain isn't. If anyone is reading this and knows of a specialist, medical trial, miracle drug or can recommend and help me pay for a great health insurance plan that would benefit my special needs, it would be greatly appreciated because even if our home is saved from foreclosure, I may not be here to continue taking care of my mom if I can't fix myself. Statistics show that 63% of caregivers will die during their time providing care, with many family caregivers dying an average of two years before the Alzheimer's patient for whom they care. My death should not be the price of caring for my parents. I think that I am worthy of support. Thank you for reading our story to the end, as I'm sure your time is valuable and you spend it wisely, as you do your money. Much love, health and happiness to your and your family. Angeline and Pat Askham
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